They say bad things come in 3's.

Gone are the days where meatball eats in her sleep and nibbles on her waterbottle...

Now i can only hope that Bun Bun stays alive. She hasn't been eating or drinking, which expains her unsually clean cage... and my unusually free maid. I think she's deaf. She didn't reply when i called her name a coupla hundred times. No doubt about her cataracted right eye. Her right ear seems usually floppy as well. And to top it all, her hind legs are super weak to carry her to the other end of the cage.

It hurts to see how she wants to try to come to me but she can't and she just flops over like a battered rag doll and then she gives up. It's as if she knows her fate.

I'd like to take her to the vet. But i'm fuckin broke to pay for her x-ray, much less her consultation fees. I just want to know if she's in pain.

I don't even know if i can make it to school today without losing control of my emotions while i so carefully carve my design on to my clay sphere.

Fuck these never ending tears. Maybe i should stop drinking liquids so that i won't cry any more. Take a whole container(as in the containers you see in jurong port) of painkillers for my heart to numb the pain.

Now i will drown myself in Killswitch and hope that i don't break down in tears when i ask someone if i could bury BunBun in their gardens IF she's lost her will to live.

Meatball went to hamster heaven. BunBun's seems frail. What's next?

suri thought at 11:23 AM